Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
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