We need to rekindle our bromance
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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