i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Randomize
