Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
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