Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Randomize
