Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
