I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
