You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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