Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
