forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Let's get the cat blown out
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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