margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize