Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
A+ Viking dick
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
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