weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I will pee on everything he values.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
