Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
The uberlube is also flammable
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Randomize
