Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
His nipple licking is glorious
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