Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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