Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
You were trust falling into bushes
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
