I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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