yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I wish you could order shots online.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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