can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
now i know why i became what i already was.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
