I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
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