Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
