I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
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