is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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