You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
