I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
