Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
