So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
