bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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