yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
do herpes really smell.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
