It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
