I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
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