You work out of a Hotel?
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Randomize
