Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
