I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
