lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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