Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
