We're like a lot better than the average bears
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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