Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
She told me I should be a condom model.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Randomize
