did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize