You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
