so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
