Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
