hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize