I think i sorta joined a cult last night
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
