ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize