the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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