Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize
