i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
