Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
