Whats the glycemic index on semen?
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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